Golden Globes: Television World According to Katie

There's really nothing I hate more than awards "season"--it's self-serving, usually wrong, and somehow depressing, I think because it's a lot of mediocre people thanking "God" for their mediocre but slap-me-on-the-back success. Anyway, of all of the shows, the Golden Globes are the most normal and the nominations are just out. So of course this is the perfect time for me to weigh in on what would happen if the world was right. So, here we go (my picks are starred).

BEST TELEVISION SERIES – DRAMA:
BIG LOVE (HBO)
**DAMAGES (FX NETWORKS)
GREY’S ANATOMY (ABC)
HOUSE (FOX)
MAD MEN (AMC)
THE TUDORS (SHOWTIME)
I'm not gonna lie...none of these even came close to the awesomeness of Damages this season. Nothing...nuh-thing. While Big Love and House are also favorites of mine, Damages set a new bar this season with awesome writing, an excellent cast, and the meter of the show that forced...*forced*...you to obsessively cling to the television on Tuesday nights simply longing for just one more piece of information...just one more...begging for it...and nope, we'll have to wait til next week. Man, I already miss that show. And if effing Gray's Anatomy goes home with this award, I'm going to hurl.

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTRESS IN A TELEVISION SERIES – DRAMA:
PATRICIA ARQUETTE - MEDIUM
GLENN CLOSE - DAMAGES
MINNIE DRIVER - THE RICHES
EDIE FALCO - THE SOPRANOS
SALLY FIELD - BROTHERS & SISTERS
HOLLY HUNTER - SAVING GRACE
**KYRA SEDGWICK - THE CLOSER
I'm not going to lie (again)...this is a tough category, but Kyra really *created* this character. The whole show rests on her ability to sell Brenda--if she doesn't do it, everybody sinks. She did it. And in what was somewhat of a revival. This show came into its own this season and it's because of Sedgwick. Edie Falco's always a good choice and Minner Driver is excellent in her series, but Sedgwick keeps me comin' back for more every Monday. And, if there is any justice, Holly Hunter will never, ever win for her character that has been plugged as this "tough, street-smart but lovable woman"--frankly she's mannish and one-dimensional...and unappealing in every way. Hunter plays the role well, but it's not well written or conceived. Thus, she ends up looking like Kyra Sedgwick's ugly younger sister (the shows air back to back on Mondays) who didn't get enough attention in her formative years.

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR IN A TELEVISION SERIES – DRAMA:
MICHAEL C. HALL - DEXTER
JON HAMM - MAD MEN
HUGH LAURIE - HOUSE
JONATHAN RHYS MEYERS - THE TUDORS
**BILL PAXTON - BIG LOVE
Bill Paxton needs to win this. I absolutely love Hugh Laurie as House, but that character has become sadly stale and static. On the other hand, you've got Paxton who's juggling 3 wives and families as one in his fundamentalist Mormon family on the brink of disaster. It's luscious and he's the lynchpin here too. If he bites it, so does the show, and he's made that show into a smashing success.

BEST TELEVISION SERIES – COMEDY OR MUSICAL:
30 ROCK (NBC)
CALIFORNICATION (SHOWTIME)
ENTOURAGE (HBO)
EXTRAS (HBO)
**PUSHING DAISIES (ABC)
Another close call, but it's gotta go to Pushing Daisies which is by far the most inventive, unique half-hour comedy & musical (and I'm not kidding) on network television. It's just so good--story, acting, conception...everything. Like watching a fantastical, Tim Burton movie every week and feeling fuller and better for it at the end. It's just so fulfilling. Well done, Pie Maker. Well done.

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTRESS IN A TELEVISION SERIES –COMEDY OR MUSICAL:
CHRISTINA APPLEGATE - SAMANTHA WHO?
AMERICA FERRERA - UGLY BETTY
TINA FEY - 30 ROCK
ANNA FRIEL - PUSHING DAISIES
**MARY-LOUISE PARKER - WEEDS
I'm gonna pick MLP because she's the bomb on this show, but really anybody but America Ferrera could win this and I'd be happy. I find AF annoying b/c that, like Grey's, has become stale and "been there" but she keeps winning because it seems like she "should." I say NO MORE. Let's call it like it is...please.

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR IN A TELEVISION SERIES – COMEDY OR MUSICAL:
**ALEC BALDWIN - 30 ROCK
STEVE CARELL - THE OFFICE
DAVID DUCHOVNY - CALIFORNICATION
RICKY GERVAIS - EXTRAS
LEE PACE - PUSHING DAISIES
Alec Baldwin may be a total jackass in real life, but that dude has the *ultimate* comedic talent and it's time to give him a nod for this show. He's got such an unsavory part--he's evil but ya love him (huhn...kinda like in real life)--but he's brilliant. I'd love to give my approval to Steve Carell, but that's such an ensemble cast project that this is not the award for him. And Lee Pace is just a little too green--but he is the Pie Maker and I love him for that.

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTRESS IN A SUPPORTING ROLE IN A SERIES, MINI-SERIES OR MOTION PICTURE MADE FOR TELEVISION:
ROSE BYRNE - DAMAGES
RACHEL GRIFFITHS - BROTHERS & SISTERS
KATHERINE HEIGL - GREY’S ANATOMY
SAMANTHA MORTON - LONGFORD
ANNA PAQUIN - BURY MY HEART AT WOUNDED KNEE
JAIME PRESSLY - MY NAME IS EARL
To be honest, I could care less. Rose Byrne was okay in Damages but she seemed miscast to me from the beginning. I really despise both Rachel Griffiths (whiny, calls acting "her craft") and Katherine Heigl (utterly, absolutely can we chant it together basketball-style "Ov-er-RA-ted (bah bah BAH BAH BAH). I didn't watch the other two. So to whomever wins this: Bully for You. If it's Katherine Heigl, reference the prior chant and go find some acting lessons.

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR IN A SUPPORTING ROLE IN A SERIES, MINI-SERIES OR MOTION PICTURE MADE FOR TELEVISION:
**TED DANSON - DAMAGES
KEVIN DILLON - ENTOURAGE
JEREMY PIVEN - ENTOURAGE
ANDY SERKIS - LONGFORD
WILLIAM SHATNER - BOSTON LEGAL
DONALD SUTHERLAND - DIRTY SEXY MONEY
Ted was awesomely evil and delicious in this show...and c'mon...can I really deny Sammy (Cheers) my vote? Naw....

So, there it is. If I ruled the world, all of the most deserving and talented people will get the acclaim. Let's hope the Hollywood Foreign Press is on board with my vision.